Bold Introvert Series Featured Blogger Guest Post Introversion

Bold Introvert; Let’s Hear From Ashley

Name: Ashley

Random question: You’re a new addition to the crayon box. What color would you be and why?

If I were a new addition to the crayon box I would be a deep, but vibrant blue like a beautiful body of water, because I relate to the way water can appear smooth and calm, but in fact, is extremely powerful and can conquer anything it sets its sights on. I would be called “Lull”, like the calm before the storm.

Are you a bold introvert ? 

Yes, I believe I am a bold introvert. I am not typically outgoing and will avoid being the center of attention at basically any cost, but I also have learned to be confident in my own skin, to not care what others think, and to be fearless in my passions and ambitions. I have realized being an introvert makes me more unique and makes me, me in so many ways. I’ve learned to embrace the fact that my shyness makes people curious and being someone who values privacy, I kind of like the natural mystery in that. I’ve realized that while, like I said, privacy is important to me, I also have found an abundance of fulfilment in sharing my story with others who feel comforted and empowered by not being alone in these oh so common, but not necessarily discussed life experiences.

Ashley 3

I have not always been a bold introvert. Growing up I was even more reserved and shy than I am now. I was far less confident and comfortable in my own skin. I would look around at others and question why I was so different, how they were so confident and outgoing without pause, and it would baffle me how others could be around people all of the time and never seem to experience the same need to recharge with some much needed alone time. I’ve always been someone who needs time to veg out, evaluate, and build myself up for public settings. And, more than anything, I’ve struggled with people mistaking my shyness for being stuck up or rude.

I think becoming a mother was a huge turning point for me. It’s the point in my life I can most identified as being the moment I realized if I want my daughter to be confident, strong, and to value herself… I needed to not only speak those things into her, but also lead by example. She happens to be an introvert like myself, as opposed to her far more outgoing daddy =) Because of this I recognize her behavior whereas he tends to misjudge what her intentions are. For instance, we are a very active family, we enjoy adventures and being outside, so given the opportunity my husband loves to get her out to play with the neighbors. While my daughter enjoys this as well, she also visibly gets drained by the fact that she’s surrounded by people. When she’s ready to come inside my husband, being very much an extrovert, takes this as her being lazy or rude, but I see it clear as day; she needs to recharge. Because of my ability to relate to this I feel I’m better equipped to not only help her manage it and give her tools to better handle these types of situations, but it also gives me better insight into how it appears from the outside. I can better see, in myself, how others would perceive my need to retract. This insight gives me more drive to step outside of my comfort zone in even the simplest of ways such as being the first to say hello at the grocery store.

Ashley 1

What do you do?

I am a stay-at-home-mom. I quit my job when I was seven months pregnant with my daughter so that I could thoroughly enjoy raising her and spending the very short amount of time we are blessed with our children under our roof. I am also a freelance graphic designer. I attended Art School after I graduated high school. While going to school full time I also worked as a Graphic Designer for a local newspaper as well as began building a freelance clientele in my “free-time”. After 4-5 years of working for the newspaper by day and my freelance clients by night I finally built up enough of an income to take the great leap into full time self-employment. More recently, a little over a year ago, I became an Etsy Shop owner. Initially this endeavour was intended to be more of a side project, just something I could make a few bucks off of when I did favors for friends and family, but I am surprised to say it has grown so quickly I often wonder if it can become my new full-time source of income. Most recently I have added “blogger” to my resume. I have always greatly enjoyed writing. It’s been something I have found comfort and therapy in throughout my life. Although, I have never been confident in sharing the majority of my writing, but when my daughter was born I began writing letters to her periodically. These letters began to give me more confidence in sharing with others and in turn were greatly inspiring to me when it came to deciding to start my blog. My blog is basically my life story broken up into short story form. It also features my Letters to Siena as well as a few poems. I hope to one day turn my letters and my blog into books. And, finally, I have also been a high school volleyball coach for the past 10 years. It’s been one of the most rewarding jobs of my life thus far. As much as I love the game of volleyball, I mostly value the amount of young girls I’ve gotten to know, inspire, relate to, advice and watch become amazing young women. It’s taught me so many lessons in being a better mother, a better friend, and just an all round better woman as a whole.

Ashley 2

What are you most proud of?

Aside from being a mommy, I am most proud of my professional success. I built my career from the ground up with my own two hands and find that incredibly fulfilling. I’ve always been driven and competitive. I hold myself to a high standard and find confidence in knowing I can stand on my own two feet no matter what life throws at me. I hope some day when my daughter is grown she can look at everything I’ve done, despite being an introvert, and believe in herself. I hope she sees she can do anything she sets her mind to even if it feels scary or intimidating.

Do you feel that your personality trait has helped you achieve your goals ?

Yes, I feel the wide variety of personality traits I have have helped me succeed and achieve my goals. I believe being an introvert makes me a better listener, better observer, more understanding, more patient and open minded, but, I’m also very passionate about everything I put my mind to. I am not afraid to fight for or speak up about things I feel strongly about. All of these things vastly help me in my professional and personal life.

What advice do you have for introverts that are worried about chasing their dreams?

My biggest advice for introverts who are worried about stepping out of their comfort zone to chase their dreams would be this; you have gifts within you that were meant to be shared. Taking a leap of faith is incredibly terrifying, but when you reach your goals and turn around and look back at where you came from… nothing is more rewarding and uplifting. You’ll be so glad you persevered. I would also remind introverts reading this to remember that, in general, people are fairly self-absorbed… so while in our introvert minds we assume the worst, we imagine one spoken word will stop the room and all eyes will be found on us… the reality of it is, people are far more worried about what they themselves are saying or doing to give a whole lot of thought to what we’re saying or doing 😉 And, even if we do catch more attention than what makes us comfortable, the world is spinning so fas these days, that that moment will pass and people will be on to the next attraction before we even know what happened. Just go for it!

Links:

Ashley’s Etsy Shop

Ashley’s Blog

Ashley’s Instagram

Ashley’s Twitter

 

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6 comments on “Bold Introvert; Let’s Hear From Ashley

  1. krismadeablog

    “Lull”, that is a powerful name. I can identify with needing to recharge. I hate it how my extroverted friends act like they don’t understand the need for me to just be alone and recharge. “No, I’m not being mean. I just don’t want to be around you all right now.”

    • Definitely agree that ‘Lull’ is a powerful name. I think a lot of introverts could relate to being water. We appear calm and soft on the outside but inside we’re such powerful and determined beings!

      Thanks again Ashley for gracing us with your beautiful perception on life!

  2. ashleygirres

    Amen to that! People take things too personally.

  3. ashleygirres

    Reblogged this on Welcome.

  4. Pingback: The Bold Introvert - as featured on Quietly Ambitious » Feature Story

  5. Pingback: What is ‘Quiet Shaming’ and How Is It Affecting Introverts? – Quietly Ambitious

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