Everyone likes positive feedback. There’s something about it that reaffirms who you are. It’s confirmation of the person you always thought you were meant to be. It boosts your confidence, pushes you to work harder and it can also encourage you to take more risks. Compliments, feedback and the likes are all really good things. But what do you do when you’re not receiving the recognition you want? When you’ve been working tirelessly on a project and it seems to fall flat?
Let me talk from my perspective.
I can honestly say I’m a person that doesn’t like negative feedback. Give me positive feedback and it suddenly boosts my confidence and makes me feel more confident. So yes I may be the sort of person that may back away from an idea because no one supported me in it. It’s not something I’m proud of but it is definitely a trend I’ve seen in my life. For example, I often get really excited and pleased with myself when people comment on my blog posts. When I get ‘X’ amount of likes I suddenly feel more accomplished. It encourages me to write more. I’ve had people reach out to me both old time friends and strangers who have said that my posts resonated with them or helped them through a difficult period. This instantly makes me feel accomplished. But when I get no likes…or no comments it discourages me slightly (I’m not gonna lie). I get frustrated and think…well I know my content is good why aren’t people reading my work?!
But I’m trying to learn that in the beginning I may have to work for little or no rewards. I understand that I may put my all into an idea but it may not work out the way I intended. Yes it’s frustrating. Yes it’s draining. But sometimes it’s just how it is. If I’m honest sometimes I look at other people and I think I’m way more talented than them why am I not getting the recognition I deserve? At this point I usually have to refocus…because comparing my talents to others will not get me to my goals any quicker. Sometimes the option to give up seems appealing. Why? because no one likes to feel undervalued. It’s demotivating.
But I know all this can change if I just change my mind-set.
I realised I was seeking approval from others and using their recognition as the driving force for my dreams. But I’m realising that I cannot continue like that. I have to write from the heart…regardless of recognition.
However, I realised that as much as I shouldn’t let those negative moments dictate my actions, neither should I let my happy moments control my actions. If I only write when I get positive feedback what does that say to my readers? What does that say about me as a person? It says I’m only in it for the recognition…when that’s not true. I write to inspire and impact others.
This is why I’m learning to motivate and encourage myself. I’ve chosen this path to explore things I’m passionate about and neither positive nor negative feedback should change that. I’m not saying I’ve changed over night. Please understand this is a process…and yes it is frustrating. But I’m sharing with you some of the realness that comes with stepping out of your comfort zone and pursuing your dreams.
It’s easy to take motivation from others. But it shows character if you can motivate yourself!