Commitment issues

21 Oct

For me, the word commitment evokes feelings of heaviness. It instantly puts the pressure on and takes all enjoyment out of whatever I’m doing. I see it as responsibility. I see it as accountability. I see it as any other word ending in -lity that sounds remotely important. The idea of commitment causes me to freeze in action. Why? because making the decision to commit requires me to cut off all other options. For me, I see it as putting all my eggs in one basket. I prefer to have options and unfortunately commitment doesn’t give me that.

Life would be simple if I could put in half the amount of work and receive all the benefits. Or if I could wholeheartedly commit but still keep my options open. It would be nice if I could choose when and where I wanted to work and if I didn’t feel like committing then it wouldn’t matter.

Life would be easy if it was like that.

But unfortunately, the world doesn’t work in that way and to be successful in anything requires a certain level of commitment. You can’t just become the best blogger or writer without committing at some stage. Through the commitment you’ll learn new things and get rid of the old. It will force you to build character and develop resilience. Commitment will help push you to the top. But avoiding the commitment (like I do) may leave you in the same position you were in last year and the year before that. Yes, commitment may be terrifying but it’s crucial to success.

To be honest, I’ve often avoided the big C. Not in terms of relationships but in terms of life pursuits. Securing a career. Starting a business etc. I usually stop at a certain point; a point where I can comfortably manage without too much effort. I’m always aware when I reach this point because the pressure begins to descend. I feel the heaviness of responsibility…and in that moment, I usually back down. I find something else to occupy my time. I distract myself in hopes that the looming feeling of commitment will just disappear. But unfortunately for me it doesn’t.

[When you’re ambitious the thought of remaining stagnant leaves you feeling restless and frustrated.]

I often ask myself… “Natalie, are you really ambitious if you’re not willing to commit?” Well the answer is yes. I do see myself as ambitious but I also recognise that my commitment (or lack thereof) is not helping my situation. It’s time for me to embrace commitment into my life. I must commit. I must give my all.

As you may or may not know I started this blog in May of this year (2015). I had previously tried my hand at natural hair blogging but felt there weren’t enough topics I cared about to write in detail. So I decided to create this new platform to openly discuss my thoughts and to potentially give people advice along the way. [I like to think I’m mature for my age and despite my 25 years of inexperience I do have a well balanced perspective on life.] However, I’m 5 months young into the blogging game and I am still yet to commit to a regular posting day or even topics. I post sporadically. I network occasionally. I guess I’m still finding my feet in this new blogging world. Learning the new language, customs and expectations from bloggers and readers. It’s all fun but it’s time to take it more seriously.

This is why I’m writing this series to get me ready for my next level of commitment. For the rest of this series I’ll go through what it means to commit, why we find it so hard and then I’ll give you some tips at the end. There will also be an additional post where I’ll be announcing to you all my blogging commitments for the foreseeable future. I’m excited to share.

Until next time

Nat

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2 Responses to “Commitment issues”

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Commitment is an act, not a word | Quietly Ambitious - October 28, 2015

    […] my previous post I outlined the issues I have with commitment. When I’m trying to improve aspects of my life, […]

  2. My Blogging Commitments | Quietly Ambitious - November 18, 2015

    […] you’re wondering where all this has come from? please refer back to my previous posts here, here, and here to find out what I’m talking […]

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